Sermon 9 Wilfred - How do you choose your partner and what is dating?

Giving your Christian partner is serious business. Marriage is a matter for the matter and God hates divorce, so consider carefully who you are dating (listen to Sermon 10), use your time to get to know each other well before you make a covenant until death.

Genesis 2:24 Therefore a man leaves his father and his mother and cleaves to his wife, and they become one flesh.
Genesis 24:67 Then Isaac brought her into the tent, and took Rebekah, and she became his wife.
1 Korintiërs 6:16 Do you not know that he who joins himself to a prostitute becomes one body with her? For, as it is written, "The two shall become one flesh."

This clearly shows that having sexual intercourse is a marriage covenant.

How do you choose your partner?

Choosing your partner is a careful consideration and action that people cannot think lightly about. The one you marry is for the rest of life. Kissing and being in each other's arms is not a courtship, one should definitely avoid that if one is younger than 24 and there is still no self-control. Kissing and certainly mouth kisses and being intimate leads to compulsion towards sexual communion. And many have died and the girl has become pregnant.

How well do you know your partner?

How well do you know your partner and How well do you match. Here are some test questions:

If you have some free time, which activity would you prefer to do with your partner?
Read a book
Relaxing at home, eating and watching movies
Volunteer work at a homeless shelter
Relax on the beach

If you were going to watch a movie together, which of these genres would you most likely choose?
Action
Thriller
Drama
Horror
Romance

If you were broke, what would be the most romantic thing you would do for your partner?
Buy him / her a nice gift with your credit card
Give emotional support
Make him / her a gift from small treasures that you have saved
Reassure him, "I love you! You're the only one for me."

If you eat together, how do you decide where to eat?
My partner always decides
We choose randomly. Sometimes I choose, sometimes he/she does.
We throw a coin on
We alternate who can choose

How compatible are the two you think?
Not at all
Extreme
Normal
Does it matter?

What do you think is the most important aspect of a successful relationship?
Close compromises
Communication
Trust
Just being together

What minimum level of education should your partner have to be most attractive to you?
It doesn't matter
University completed
College completed
High school

Is it important that everyone has their own friends?
It doesn't matter
Very important
Important

How important is the intelligence of your partner for you?
My partner is not super smart, but I still love him/her
Not at all. I just love his or her body
It's important, but I don't know how to describe it
It ensures that I respect him/her more

Which of these would you choose to describe yourself?
Organized, simple, fun
Always-too-late, nothing is important
Dedicated, intelligent, hardworking
Easy, humorous, passionate
Emotional, depressed, selfish

Describe your partner. Is he / she:
Responsible, serious, determined
Scattered, spontaneous, wild
Selfish, unreliable, absent?
Loving, sensitive, caring?

Is the intellect of your partner an addition to you as a person?
I don't care Yes
No
Sometimes

How many times in a week do you want to have fellowship in your future marriage?
More than five times
Once
Once every two weeks
Two to four times
During menstruation

How many times in a week do you want to have fellowship in your future marriage?
More than five times
Once
Once every two weeks
Two to four times
During menstruation

How many children do you want?
1 to 2
4+
3-4
0

Is the relationship with the Lord Jesus Christ important?
Daily Bible reading, prayer and Bible study
We do it together
We do it separately and then we discuss the
Limited to Sunday

How important is your partner's relationship with your parents for you?
My partner's parents have died
Important
I don't care Unimportant

Can you see that your partner handles money responsibly?
No
Yes
Price conscious, quality / price
Sometimes

Can you see that your partner is a good parent?
No
Yes
Sometimes
My partner is a big child, so that's a big no

Can you see that your partner is responsible and caring?
No
Yes
Sometimes

Is your partner capable of doing the household, cooking, washing, cleaning, taking care of the children?
No
Yes
Sometimes

Do you have the same core values?
Do you eat meat or are you vegetarian, how often do you eat meat per week?
If there is a fight or conflict, how do you resolve this?
Do you know the same ideas about your future?
Do you have the same vision?

When there are children, does the woman continue to work full-time or part-time?
Yes
No
Only if the children are older than four years

How much time do you want to spend together?
Only one wants nothing more than to spend time together constantly The other wants a bar relationship
I think it is always smart to take regular rest, whatever form you choose
Constantly being social and engaged in the church

Can you do well without each other?
Even if you enjoy being with others a lot. The future of your relationship is also determined by how well you can do without each other. It is very difficult to maintain a healthy relationship if you find it difficult not to be together.

What are the plus and minus points of your partner. Make a list. Can you talk to each other calmly? It helps to understand the other, why that point of view. Minor irritations can grow into frustrations in marriage.

Are you trying to change each other?
He's trying to change you. If there are too many things that drive you crazy, this will sooner or later break up the relationship
Suppose your friend is forgetful:
If you get irritated by that, you have a problem. Do you really want to be with someone who does things that you find annoying?
But if you think: “Oh, he's forgetful. How cute!" and doesn't mind it all so much. Then there is not much going on and you fit together in that regard. It is important that you think about this in advance. Because these kinds of minor irritations can get much bigger in the course of a relationship.

Do you know each other's deepest motives?
Yes
No
Sometimes

Can you get along with each other's family?
If he doesn't like your mother so much, or you can't stand his father, that's not a problem.
But if your family is very important to you, and they disapprove of it, you will end up in a situation where you may have to choose.
You want to have thought about this in advance.

Do you find it important that your partner is honest and does not lie?
Yes
No
A lie for the best is allowed

Can you trust him/her with everything?
I can say anything to him/her, but I don't do this because I don't feel well about that.
Yes, he/she will always be there for me in any situation. We can talk about EVERYTHING without keeping secrets I could, but he/she can't keep secrets, so I'd rather not do it We do not talk about things that others may not know.

When do you miss him/her?
In the evening when I am sitting in front of TV and have nothing to do Always, even if I have just seen him/her I could go back to him/her and stay longer.
Never, I like being with him/her, but I never have the feeling 'I wish I was with him her now'.
Sometimes, usually when I see/hear something that reminds me of him/her.

Do you have the same thoughts about the same things?
Yes
No
We respect each other's opinions
We can talk about it

Do you find it long-lasting how your partner is dressed, at home, at a party, to church, etc.
Yes
Unimportant
Important

Do you find it important what your partner looks like?
Yes
Important
Unimportant
With makeup
No makeup
Moderate makeup

Do one has hobbies?
Joint
Partly
Everyone for themselves

Conditions for marriage?

The conditions for the marriage is Genesis 2:24. Leaving your father and your mother. Living completely independently, not in the parents' house. Financial independence from parents and others. Being able to independently provide for one's own livelihood, rent, energy, water, food, clothing, etc. Being able to make decisions independently, without always seeking advice from parents and others. Independently able to resolve disputes with each other. respect for each other's opinion. ABOUT COMMUNICATION WITH EACH OTHER, consultations and decisions.